Have you ever noticed when you're driving down the road there's very little traffic - until you get to the place you need to turn off, especially when you're making a left turn. Out of nowhere a string of cars materializes in the oncoming lane. So you sit and wait fifteen minutes before you can make your turn. I blame it on Murphy, of Murphy's Law fame.
Murphy's Law has many permutations in all everyday activities. Still another has to do with cars. I call it Murphy's Law of the Parking Lot. Mall and shopping center parking lots are common places to encounter the phenonmenon. You get to the Mall, go up and down a few aisles trying to find a spot fairly close to the entrance. The only one you can find is your least favorite, between an extended cab Ford pickup and a Dodge Rendezvous. You go in, walk around browsing the department stores and wind up buying paper plates and a figurine at the Dollar Tree, grab a hot pretzel and coffee.
Noticing that it's almost time to start supper you exit the Mall. When you get to your car, five people, all heavy-set, are cramming themselves and three hours worth of shopping bags and boxes into the Rendezvous. Since they're blocking your way to enter your car, you decide to toss your bags into your car trunk. Just then the Ford pickup zooms out of the slot on the other side and narrowly misses running over your foot. Coincidence that drivers of the vehicles on either side of you came out of the mall the same time you did? I used to think so. But it's happened so many times I know it has to be Murphy's fault.
I'm not sure if these next few items can be blamed on Murphy, but I'm tempted to do it.
You never lose the recipe of dishes you dislike.
You can never wear out ugly clothing.
"This will only take a minute" is the biggest lie known to man.
No washing machine in history has ever returned a lost sock.
No one ever breaks your hideous glassware. And its corollary. Any breakable lamp or other collectable you treasure WILL be cracked or broken at some point.
And, alas, it's impossible to schedule a headache.
©2011 Sylvia Nickels
